Queen: the title somehow made her slightly frightened Hanna. She found herself in a daze. Every since she said the words “I Do” her mind had been in a fog, trying to really grasp the fact that she was now married, now Queen, now a wife…and at her age. Who would have thought? Since a young girl, she never would have supposed her life would turn out lie this. She thought that maybe if she was lucky she would marry a man of low rank who only cared about her money, but here she was, married to a rather handsome man, who was the most powerful man in the country she lived. At least, she supposed he held the most power. It made sense.

Once the ceremony was over, and she had been introduced to numerous people, of which she could not remember a single name, she was soon led up to her new chamber, where her husband slept as well. No doubt, everyone expected what would happen, and for Hanna she was almost frightened. What if she displeased him, and cast her aside. It would be a horrible way to start a marriage, no doubt, but would he dare do that now that she was his wife? Hanna could not say, for she had not the chance to pin his character.

Hanna tried to calm her mind, once she was left alone in the room. The servants said Aeden would arrive shortly, so she had not a lot of time to gather her thoughts before the moment, if he happened to be in the mood. Of course, she was sure, her looks would make him think twice, and she would be free for that one night. Then again, he might decide to try and get it over with the first night. In a frantic, Hanna put on her nightly clothes and climbed into the large bed, the warmth of the covers relaxing her for a bit. She waited there, minute after minute, knowing that each second brought him closer to the room.

Her parents had told her once that the experience was once in a lifetime. It was something to enjoy. Hanna could not help but laugh at that now. She felt sure that it would not be, not when she didn’t love him, and the love wasn’t reciprocated. Not when she was this young. Everything in her life was moving too fast, and she couldn’t help but wish that they would slow down, if only for a bit.

They didn’t though. Pretty soon, Hanna heard the door knob turn. Her heart gave a jolt, as she lifted herself up to lead against the backboard of the bed, and waited for his entrance.

Aedan had retreated to his room to put on his nightshirt.. and to gulp down a measure of brandy. Too much, and he wouldn't be able to perform--and that was necessary. To hurry his lukewarm desires further, he had to produce an heir before he could join his men at the front. An heir, or at least begin work on it. Perhaps he could bring Hanna with him to the front, as his father had brought his wife... but that couldn't be what proper kings did. He wasn't his father, Aedan thought bitterly.

He stood naked for a moment, looking at himself in the battered mirror in the corner. He wasn't old, but he was... he was thirty. Twice the age of his bride. Tight-lipped, Aedan shrugged on his nightshirt and ran a hand through his close-cropped hair. Other rulers might have used a manservant to dress themselves; not he. Outside, his guards waited in respectful silence. His guards, and the Cardinal, who would witness the consummation.

"Come on," he told the curate abruptly, setting off before him down the hall to the chambers he would share with the new Queen. They were, thank God, separate from his own private rooms.

When he reached his destination, he paused again, then shrugged--turned the knob--and opened the door.

"My Queen." He gave a little bow, and advanced toward the bed in measured strides. She looked frightened; young, childish. He sat down beside her, and waited for the Cardinal to make his stooping way into the room. "He'll be here, but we can draw the bed-curtains," he said, his tone even. Aedan didn't speak so much in comfort, at which he usually felt like a failure in any case. He spoke simply, honestly. He felt awful. Beneath him, he felt the mattress sag at his solid weight. "Here."

He gestured toward the guards, who stepped forward to do so, and then he and his bride were enclosed in a muffled curtain of velvet and shame.

He acted respectful enough, and didn't seem displeased, but he didn't seem pleased either they they would be sharing this bed tougher. Honestly, Hanna would have rather had him show one emotion or the other instead of just apathy. At least, that was what she assumed it was. As she watched him bow, and then walk over to her, she couldn't help but wonder if this would be how things would always be in the future.

Looking at him now, it was hard to tell if he had at first been in the mood to do their duty, so to speak, but why else would he approach her new room, if that was not his intention? Hanna felt a small frown form on her face as she thought of that. The rooms was yet more evidence that he would soon shut her out of his life forever. She would only be Queen in appearance. She would never be the queen of his heart.

Once he laid down beside her, Hanna felt her heart race even faster. She couldn't help but look away for a moment, as he ordered the guards to cover the beds. She suddenly felt quite awkward, with their presence. Hanna could only guess that would have to be a price she would pay for such a high position. She would get no privacy, something she was not looking forward to.

Once, at last the curtains concealed them from any prying eyes, she he her teeth graze against her lips as she looked at him, wondering what to do. She could only make up what would be the proper thing to do next, but imagination and reality were two very different things. Still unsure of how to react, she let her body, lean slightly towards him, hopefully giving him the incentive to make the first move. All sorts of things filled her mind. She wondered if she would disappoint him, if, because of her inexperience, he would never decided to come to her bed again after this night. That was certainly something she did not want. With all her heart, she hoped she would not make a fool of herself. Everyone would certainly know with guards standing nearby. That was her one wish: to hopefully interest him enough. Maybe she should say something...maybe that would make this night more pleasant.

Trying to rack her brains to find something suitable to say, she came up blank. She figured on second thought that maybe it would be better to be silent and not ruin the moment.
---

Aedan watched Hanna.

There's a peculiar sort of tone to any interaction when neither party is inclined to speak. Natural and superficial power relationships assert themselves. For Aedan, this meant that he (the King, the husband) looked down at Hanna with a faint kind of repugnance. It wasn't physical. In fact, it would have been worse if he had desired her more; her mind was, for all he knew, entirely empty.

Silence.

It hung in the air like the murdered ghost of the living woman beside him.

Aedan wasn't always good at remembering that the people around him had something inside. Not just when they spoke to him, or when they replied cleverly, but always, invariably. She might as well be a doll; and his toys had always been weaponry and soldiers. Playing house suited him ill.

She'd inclined her body toward him. Awkwardly, he raised his hand (so large and rough against the dull, childish roundness of her face) and touched her cheek. Passion, to Aedan, was something words simply could not coax to life. The verbal world and the tactile were separate. When he made love to a woman, he thought in touch. When he spoke, or when he sat in a separate and unthawing silence, he thought in words (harsh and condemnatory). Touch held nothing of condemnation. He'd take refuge in that.

He let his hand slide down her face, to her neck, and down to the hem of her nightdress, over her body. Beautiful she might not be, but soft and pleasing to touch? Yes...

He spoke only once. "I'll try not to hurt you."

And sank into the depthless well of purely physical pleasure.

What was he thinking? That was the only question that ran through Hanna’s mind as they sat for a while in silence. She did not know if he was waiting on her or not to do something. She could only hope that it would not end up that way, for she had in her mind that he was certainly more experienced in this area than she was. That much she was sure of.

For a minute, Hanna wondered if anything would ever happen. She wondered if he thought her a bad wife for not doing anything, but could he blame her? She was rather nervous. Maybe he was having second thoughts,

At last, out of the corner of her eye she saw his hand move. She turned and let his hand rest upon her cheek, feeling the rough skin against her own. Slowly, ever so slowly, it moved down to her neck. She felt her heart been wildly. She had never had anyone touch her in such a way. Hanna soaked in the moment letting her eyes close, surrounding her in complete and utter darkness. She felt him work his way around to pull off her night dress, and she opened her eyes, looking straight into his. She froze for a moment lost in those eyes, until he said he would try not to harm her. That was a good thing to know, and Hanna let herself go, allowing him to do as she pleased. At least he seemed to have her best interest in mind, and that made Hanna feel slightly better.

“Okay” was her answer to his comment, the only thing she said, giving him the right to go on. Not that he didn’t have it before. He was the king after all, but she felt she had to answer in some way. With that she let her arms move as they pleased. She felt as if she had no control over herself, as if she was guided by...instinct. Even as Aeden continued, she still felt just as nervous and scared, despite his words.

King Arthur and the "roots of troubles"

The traditional treatment of women in the Arthurian saga is interesting to note in its severity. Guinevere is an adulteress, Morgan Le Fay is a witch, Morgause is an incestuous schemer, and the Lady of the Lake is the leader of a terrible, backward pagan religion. This is, of course, the treatment that has been handed down to us from the medieval writers who gave us the Christian infusion that spawned the story of the Holy Grail. ffxi gil

¡¡¡¡But if we go back to the historical writers¡ª¡ªthe writers who were treating Arthur as a historical character, not a target for pious retribution or moral sermonizing; we find that women do, more or less, have quite an important role to play in the overall health and well-being of Arthur the King.

¡¡¡¡Inherent in this last statement is this feature of earlier stories: Arthur's story did not end badly. In the earliest of stories about Arthur the King, he wasn't even the Once and Future King. He was a great warrior and won many great victories. He was a great king who had a great queen, and they both ruled a great kingdom.

¡¡¡¡ maple story mesos,Arthur's queen didn't even have a name in the earliest of stories. She was simply the queen. But she didn't, as so many modern stories tell us, have a part in the downfall of the kingdom. Even Geoffrey of Monmouth, in the happier parts of his story, has Arthur and Ganhumara (his name for the queen) holding court in a great castle in a great city called the City of the Legions. (Geoffrey later gives Guinevere a bad name, but she is all that glitters when the story opens.)

¡¡¡¡Also showered with the light of good in earlier stories is Morgan Le Fay. In the earliest of the Cornwall stories, Morgan is the Queen of Lyonesse, where Arthur is taken after his final battle. Morgan is the leader of a group of healers, all women, who will undoubtedly heal Arthur. It is perhaps out of this part of the story that William of Malmesbury crafted his vision that Arthur would come again. (William, you will remember, is the first one to mention that Arthur's grave has not been found; even though he says nothing more, he gives a strong hint that the Once and Future King part of the legend has begun.) wow gold

¡¡¡¡The Lady of the Lake as well fares rather better in the older stories. She it was who gave Arthur his first sword. She it is who is guardian of the old ways, the ways from which comes much of the magic of the original Arthurian stories. The Christian writers wanted to make Arthur a Christian king, and they didn't want any other religions getting in the way of this. Naturally, they made the Lady of the Lake a questionable character solely because of her "religious" ways.

¡¡¡¡The question then becomes one of why. Why do the women come off so bad in medieval stories? What happened to make the writers change their image of people who were so vital to the story? The answer probably lies in the spiritual realm and its resulting scriptures. The same writers who were reading the Bible and discovering that Eve was responsible for all the world's problems probably thought that they should blame Guinevere for all of Arthur's problems. Why did Arthur have a bastard son in the first place? wow gold, Because the scheming Morgause tricked him into it. Why did Morgan Le Fay hate Arthur so? Because she was jealous of the magic wielded by Merlin, Arthur's advisor. Why was the Lady of the Lake suddenly to be reviled, not revered? Because she was the head of a religion that medieval writers didn't understand or want to understand. The teachings of the Bible were such that one religion was possible (in the minds of these writers); anything else was unacceptable. (It must be said here that Arthur, Lancelot, and all the rest of the male characters take quite a beating at the hands of the medievalists as well. The whole story becomes a morality play from which only Galahad, the purse and chaste, emerges unscathed. Arthur and Lancelot, the perfect king and the perfect knight, are undone by their shared imperfect morality.)

¡¡¡¡ffxi gil, The result is that in the modern tales, women are still pretty much blamed for Arthur's troubles. Arthur's dallying with Morgause has come to be seen as something akin to the Adam and Eve story. Lancelot's love for the queen has come to be seen as equal in its devastation to the queen's own adulterous actions (that is to say, it's the woman's fault). Morgan Le Fay is reviled as a witch who wants nothing more than to ruin the kingdom of the wonderful Arthur. And the Lady of the Lake recedes ever further into the background. (Some traditions hold that she is Nimue, whose claim to "fame" is that she enchants Merlin into submission and takes him from Arthur when Arthur needs him most.)

¡¡¡¡If you want to role-play in Arthur's world, you'd better choose a male character. At least people will feel sorry for you. aion gold