Even now, when Mary put a finishing touch to Elayne's brown hair, Elayne held the letter from the King in her hand. Ever since she had received it she had carried it around as if it was a precious diamond that would shatter if she dropped it. And she was rather sure it would shatter too, because it seemed too unbelievable, too dreamlike for her to comprehend. She wasn't even sure she would be meeting with the king until Mary had dressed her up in a beautiful green gown and brushed Elayne's hair till it shone. Everything had been prepared, and there was no escape. Not that Elayne wanted to run away all that much, but it was... she'd meet with the King! In private! What could he possibly want with someone like her? She was not from an important family nor had she done anything of importance that might claim the King's attention.

"You're all set, milady! Chin up and smile pretty, yes?"

Mary's attempt to calm her mistress's nerves failed and only managed to make Elayne's heart beat faster. Because what would she do? What would she say? Her only meeting with a royal before had been the Prince, but he had been rather easy to talk to since she didn't know who he was until after they had spoken. But now she knew only too well who was waiting for her, and it made her so nervous her knees felt weak.

"I'm not all that sure I can go, after all," Elayne stuttered, sending her servant a worried look.

"Oh, stop being nonsensical, milday! Off you go and meet him you will. Let's go now!"

Mary's reply and the way she halfway pushed Elayne out of the door to her quarters made it impossible for the young lady to not give in. But all the way to the King's quarters she clung to Mary with all her might. She even pleaded Mary not to announce her coming. But no: the King was waiting!

And thus Mary announced Elayne's arrival before she disappeared down the hallway again, leaving Elayne confused and alone.

Aedan paced his room and wondered why his body was so hot when his soul felt so cold. He had his war; the army was mustering. He'd had his wife, and with luck soon he'd have an heir. One way or another, he'd have an heir. But his child-wife could only be so diverting, and he refused to ask her for more than she was prepared to give.

So: Elayne Argyle. He had seen the way the Lawley boy looked at her. Lawley! Aedan was sure that he would have the scoundrel put to death within the year, or sent into the worst of the battle, where he would die--or become a real man--anyway. Elayne Argyle was a beautiful woman, of course... but... what he really wanted was Lawley's misery. The misery of all who disobeyed him... and the girl herself. Well, her admiring looks were, admittedly, flattering. Aedan had no illusions; there were courtiers more handsome than he, who had refined good looks instead of his rugged scruffiness. And her family's ambition wouldn't drive her to such a public show of passion, not at his wedding, when all proper decorum should have been absorbed. What healthy man wouldn't respond to that?

The Queen--she need never know. She was so young. Aedan knew some men enjoyed young girls; Hell, the Greeks had enjoyed young boys. But he didn't, and Elayne was the proper mixture of youth and passionate maturity he looked for.

The sound of a servant-woman's voice shook him out of his musings, and Aedan stood up, smoothing his doublet (he was still dressed, in light summer finery). He crossed to the door and opened it, to see Elayne.

"My lady." He ushered her in. "Would you care for something to drink?"

He needed it. God, he needed to lose himself: in drink, in a woman he could feel free to touch without fear of hurting her, a woman he really admired physically... to lose himself and all the thoughts that never left him.

"You look lovely tonight."

She did; but Aedan didn't require transcendent beauty. He wanted something else. Vengeance--comfort--pride--love didn't even cross his mind.

The door suddenly opened and none other than the King stood before her. For a brief second she caught his glance, but she quickly looked down, cheeks coloured deep crimson. Why did he have to look so...handsome? She knew for certain that most of the other ladies her age preferred Darien, but to her, Darien was just... Darien. He was not someone she'd talk about with the other girls and giggle about while the servant-ladies were sleeping. No, for that she preferred Aedan. But that had been when meeting with him had seemed like a far dream! Now that he stood before her, she felt almost dizzy. Her knees would be sure to give in beneath her if she didn't move soon, and her heart kept beating uncommonly fast.

"Your highness," she managed to reply, offering him a curtsy that was fit for a King. But she didn’t have time to straighten up properly before she was ushered into the grand room behind him. Everything seemed to happen so fast that she didn’t even manage to muster a proper reply to his question about a drink. All she could do was nod and try to look enthusiastic.

The little pause while he went to get drinks allowed Elayne to take a proper look at the room she was in. The grandeur of it made her own quarters seem like a mere peasant hut and her old home faded to nothing but a pigsty. Was it even possible to live in such beauty? She felt almost certain that she would feel uncomfortable, mainly because the beauty would stun her every time she took her time to examine it.

But her trail of thoughts was broken by his sudden compliment, and she could feel all blood rushing to her face. “Th-thank you, your highness!” came a somewhat forced reply, and Elayne made sure she looked somewhere that was not in direction of the King. Because if she saw his face now, she’d be too afraid to speak for the rest of the evening, no doubt!

“I-…I must say I was surprised at your letter. I…Is there anything I can do for you, your highness?”

A forced question. It wasn’t even her own question, it was one of the things Mary had told her to say, not long ago. And right now Elayne was extremely thankful towards the woman, because she couldn’t possibly have thought of something to say on her own.

Aedan paused, his hand still on the stem of the goblet he was handing her--it contained some of the best wine from the Thiasan vinyards. The best of everything was never good enough. The most beautiful trappings, and he still felt--well--trapped. But at her words he smiled.

"Straightforward, aren't you? Well, neither of us are children, though it seems you're one of those rare maidens who has clung to her virtue past her sixteenth birthday." He smiled, and it was actually sincere, and handed her her goblet before taking a seat across from her. He made no overtures, though he did linger on the spectacle of her long and shining hair, and the skin exposed around her neck.

"It's difficult to be King," he said, without preamble. "I'm always watched. Slow wooing is therefore impossible. My wife, a political alliance. I might as well be a stallion out to stud. Don't get me wrong--" He glanced up at his companion. "I take my royal duties seriously, but sometimes I wish for the company of someone I'm not dictated to like." It was at least half of the truth; that his invitation had been prompted also by his dislike of Darien Lawley would go unsaid. "I hope you understand. Just your company--I don't ask anything more at present." It was beneath him to order anyone to his bed, and it was, indeed, enough to be in private company with a beautiful woman.

Clung to her virtue? The way he chose his word made it seem like something rare. But then again, Elayne had, up to some months ago, she'd been nothing but a country-girl who didn't know more about cort and royals than that they existed. "My uncle says the same thing, your highness. And if it displeases you, I shall try my best to hold back my words." Another answer not forged by her own mind. But this time it was not Mary, but her uncle that spoke through the girl. For he had been sure to tell her just in what way she had to talk to the king, should they ever speak.

Nodding at what he said, Elayne's smile grew only wider. "I will try my best to statisfy your wish then. Though I'm not sure if my company is enough to entertain a King."

His words had truly flattered her. For he had said that he had said he wanted the company he was not dictated to like. And since he chose her to be that person to spend time with... didn't that mean he liked her? It seemed impossible, but he had to have a reason for this. But what this also meant was that the pressure on her would not be as much as it could have been, since he just wanted her company. Had this been something other people knew about, she would have had a hard time, but... this was different.

Adjusting a bit on the skirt of her dress, Elayne slowly looked up at Aedan, as if she actually wasn't allowed to see. "You have to live up to everyone's expectation. I-it must be difficult," she said quietly. Her word were followed by a long pause before she suddenly added a "you highness". How could she forget her manners already? Not even five minutes, and she forgot. Perhaps her uncle was right; perhaps she was a hopeless idiot.

Aedan hid a smile with his wineglass. She was charming. Charming, and charmingly unaffected. Honest! Dear God. Aedan had forgotten what honesty tasted like; it had a savor like honey, and its tangy, salt-sour aftertaste. Salted honey on his tongue, and he coudl well imagine her skin as velvet under his hands... well, he had a libido, too. That was the ultimate purpose of his talks with Elayne. Every king tried to sow his seed outside of his marriage.

Still, for the moment, it was nice to try to pretend he was just any man, talking to a woman he happened to admire. Any man might not feel the same resentment toward his bride, it was true. And if he were more anyman and less a king, he might have more respect for the institution of marriage. But as he saw it, marriage had nothing to do with love and very little to do with holiness.

"Please don't hold back your words," he said, putting out one hand and pressing it on top of hers. "I appreciate candor. It's a rare thing. Generally I only hear it from some of my military men, and precious few of those. And women? Most of them want to woo the crown, and very few seem to realize there's a man under it." He shook his head. "But it's ridiculous that I should ask for pity because I'm king. There are definitely upsides!"

He raised his glass to that idea. "With luck, I'll even get to ride to war soon. I've always wanted to be a proper soldier, you know. I imagine you don't have such dreams, but most men do, I find. Your wishes must be different. What do you want, marriage? A family? I wouldn't think you the type to desire great wealth, but then, I don't know anyone who'd turn it down." Aedan smiled. His hand still rested atop hers.

"Your crown is already promised away, what is then left but the man?" Elayne asked quietly, shyly looking up at Aedan. Of course, she was painfully aware of his hand atop of hers, but she tried to act like it didn't get to her. Of course, her red cheeks had already given her away, but she liked to believe he still didn't understand just how much it moved her to touch his hand. "And I think that because you are the king, you should be allowed some pity. Like...It's difficult for you to go out alone without causing a commotion. Would it be wrong of me for pity you for such a thing?"

When the king mentioned war, the young lady moved uncomfortable in her seat. War; the excuse men had made to kill eachother. Ever since she was a little girl, she had heard the female servants back home say it. And after losing all her brothers and almost her father to it as well, Elayne agreed. War was nothing but a struggle for power and in her eyes something that should not be done. "And with luck you will return to your people unharmed," she said slowly, trying not to let her feelings get the best of her. Had it been Darien she spoke with, he'd have been forced to listen to her yell at him at how foolish he was to dream about war, but she dared not speak that freely with the King.

So as an escape from thinking more about war, she focused all her attention on what he had said last. What did she want? "I'm not even sure I know what I want, myself. I do know that I want my father to live out his life in peace, but I'm not quite sure what I want for myself, your highness. Before I was brought to the palace I dreamed of marrige, of love. But such dreams are just foolish hopes, I know that now. " She knew only too well that her dreams were foolish. Her uncle had been the one to force reality upon her by bringing her to court, and now Elayne found it difficult to keep dreaming. Everywhere she turned the only marriges that were made now was based on politics. Even Darien's sister, who was younger than Elayne herself, had said she didn't believe in love.

"As for fortune...you are right; who'd say no?" she continued, slowly relaxing again as the burning sensation his touch had left on her skin slowly faded. "I told your brother I would use the money to help my father, and I still stand by that. He has given me seventeen years of happiness already, I should repay the favour."

"Your devotion to your father is touching." Aedan shut his eyes. "Lord Edan, yes? He was wounded in the Wars, right? My father--I also cared very much for my father when I was alive. To be honest, it's his legacy I mean to carry out with this war. Your gift to your father is peace. My gift to mine, though he's in Heaven, is war."

It hadn't escaped his notice that she was not in favor of the war. But all women weren't. He could tolerate that. After all, they were left behind, and they had to watch their sons, fathers, brothers and lovers leave to an uncertain future. Men, who were there, understood better how it felt to rebel the hated barbarians from their land. For some it was a wholly religious war. For Aedan--well, he hadn't been to war yet. In that sense, he was as ignorant as any woman. But he felt quite sure that he would feel the same righteousness on the battlefield that he felt here, planning it all. It was a war for his country...

But why think about any of this when he had a beautiful woman in his rooms?

"Enough talk of these things," he said, waving the thoughts away as though they were smoke gathered in the room. "They attacked our garrison; even if we could forestall war once, it's no longer a possibility." He stroked the back of her hand lightly. "But your concern is touching..."

"Then our gifts are truely different, your majesty. But the will behind it might be the same," Elayne said slowly. She had tried to come up with something better to say, but she was becoming so painfully aware of his hand that she didn't know what to say anymore. Everything she thought of seemed so childish and girly in her mind that she found it better to keep quiet. But then... she could not just stay still when the King awaited an answer from her!

And things did not improve for the flustered girl. Indeed, his words only made her more confused and pushed her closer to the edge called panic. In the end, she saw her only escape as to stand up and start walking around the room, taking in every detail. She had looked around before, but now, because of her lack of confidence to speak, she too in everything around her. After all, how often would you be able to visit the King's quarters?

But the distance she put between them did help her calm down. At least enough for her to gulp down all the wine in her goblet, and that only made her more relaxed. Not to mention it made her feel slightly light-hearted and giggly. "You must be glad you have a wife to share your quarters with, your highness! Everything is so enormous... was it not empty and lonely when you lived here alone?" she asked suddenly, turning around and looking directly at him.

[sorry late and bad post... muse-deprived]

"A little lonely."

Aedan was sensible enough to realize why she'd pulled away. And he wasn't a heathen king, who demanded virgins from his courtiers for use like after-dinner candies. She could offer herself to him if he wanted to, and if not, he enjoyed the flirtation for itself.

"I think everyone--not only kings or queens--is a little lonely." Aedan even had less of a need for companionship than some he knew. Out hunting, or on the practice courts, he could spend long stretches of time alone. But human nature was such that it required contact, company, conversation... thirty years had taught him that much. He wiped his mouth with a cloth on the table, ridding his lips of the last traces of wine, and turned to watch Elayne. She was unquestionably beautiful, small and trim of figure. Not too much so, and not childish, like his Queen. Her skin shone whitely in the candlelight; her expression, when she turned from parsing the room to meet his eyes again, was almost childishly triumphant.

He wondered if he were playing a game with him, to try to get him to admit that he was, in fact, unhappy with his Queen. And he was. And of course she'd want to hear that.

"The Queen has her own chambers, in any case," he said, mildly, looking away. No--he didn't have the courage to denigrate her in front of another woman, and then face her tomorrow. "She's young, and doesn't like me to bother her too often."

Everyone was lonely? Thinking about what he said, Elayne concluded that he was probably right. They were all a little lonely, even if they didn't show it. But still, was not the ones surrounded by the most people the most lonely? Elayne wasn't completely sure about this, but she felt it would be rude to ask such a question.

Elayne turned around to look at the room again while thinking about what Aedan had said. So the queen had her own quarters? In one way, she could understand, as the poor girl was still young. But then again... were they not married? Should not a couple joined together live in the same rooms and sleep in the same bed?

"But then, my king, am I not young as well? Do I like to be bothered by you?" Wether it was an actual question or if she was just teasing him, Elayne was not completely sure of. But because he treated her with such casuality and because that made her relax, she was slowly forgetting to keep up her facades and barriers. Just like she forgot to behave as she should around Darien, she now started to speak and act more free around the King. Even if that, for sure, would not be accepted.

(Sorry it's so short! You know my reasons!)