Ok i'm going to post this on FanFic so before I do I need your help Just read it we have another Chapter if you want to read I guess ^^
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This story has a lot of gut-busting humor. It involves lettuce, hamsters, and Full Metal Alchemist characters. This might not be the best story you’ve ever read, but just read a little bit of it to see if you like it. R&R!

By: Black Rose Queen of Darkness and help from The Silented

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Chapter 1: Rivalry of Nations

150 years ago, b.c. (before comedy), in great Jaupak, box hamsters were powerful warriors, rulers of the land. And in northern Kitashi, where lettuce people despised the box hamsters, they planned the box hamsters’ great demise. Off in Kentarchary, it was a land of milk. But anyway, the box hamsters and the lettuce people were great rivals. For years they had been at war, but it all stopped when a massive power was unleashed causing everything to turn to stone. 150 years later, d.c. (during comedy), a streak of light broke the stones, causing the return of the war and terror.

They were in a place milk would call home, the refrigerator of the Rockbells where the two auto-mail workers lived, Pinako and Winry Rockbell. The two did not know about the war in their fridge BECAUSE THEY WERE EATING TAKE OUT!!! In that time Ed (Edward) and Al (Alphonse) Elric were on the trail to their house to fix Ed’s arm because he broke it in a fight with the man named Cheese, unknowing of the power that the cheese had.

Al: Umm bro why are you wearing that dumb hat?
Ed: Because Winry will hit me with that wrench again when she see me.
Al: But you look even..
Ed: Don’t even say it!!!
Al continuing: Look even shorter!
Ed: Shut up that is no way to treat your brother!
*grumble* Ed’s stomach rumbles.
Ed: I can’t argue right now I’m too hungry
Al: Ok come on
As they ran to the house, Ed tripped over something he thought was a rock.

Toast: Do you know where my toaster is?
Ed: What the hell?
Al: It’s a talking piece of toast!!
Toast: So, have you seen my toaster or not?!
Ed: Toast!!! Too bad for you, I’m hungry!
Ed devours the toast in one bite.
Al: Hey, here’s his little toaster!
Toast: Give me my toaster!!
Ed: That thing can still talk? Man, can I not wait to go to the bathroom!
Al: We better hurry up.
As the got up to the door, Winry’s dog came up and piddled on Al’s leg.

Al: Now dogs are using me for fire hydrants?!?!
Winry: You guys are finally here!
Ed: Do you know if you have anything that can make people go to the bathroom?
Winry: What kind of question is that?
Al: He ate a piece of talking toast. Happens all the time.
Pinako: You must be thirsty.
Ed: yeah, I am.
Pinako: How about a glass of lemonade?
Ed: Sure!
Ed slurps down the whole glass. Winry and Pinako burst out laughing.
Ed: What?
Pinako, still laughing, throws an empty bag of sea monkeys at his feet.
Ed gags.
Al laughed with them, as Ed ran into the house, got a glass and went to the fridge. When he opened the door….
Box hamsters: Die lettuce people!
One of the many lettuce people: Wait till the milk comes and helps us!
Ed: First talking toast, now battling lettuce and hamsters in a fridge?!?
Box hamsters: Hey! You over there! Who you callin a hamster? We’re BOX hamsters!!
Ed: Ok, BOX hamsters.
Lettuce people: We’re not just lettuce, we’re lettuce PEOPLE!
Ed: Ok, FINE. BOX hamsters and lettuce PEOPLE.
Lettuce people: Hey! How come you put the box hamsters first and not us?
Box hamsters: Because, YOU’RE STUPID!
Lettuce people stuck out their tongues.
Lettuce people: And, did you say, talking toast?
Toast: Hello!
Lettuce people: Hi sergeant! GASP! What did you do to Sergeant Talking Toast?!
Ed: WINRY! GET THE HELL IN HERE!
Winry: What?!
Followed by Al and Pinako, they rushed to the kitchen.
Winry: WHY ARE TALKING LETTUCE, HAMSTERS, AND FLOATING MILK!!!???
Pinako: CALL THE EXTERMINATOR!!!!
Al: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ed was paralyzed, flat on the ground.
Box hamster: Like we told the squirt over there, BOX hamsters!!
Ed woke at the word squirt: HEY YOU’RE THE FERAKING SIZE OF A BANANA!!!
Winry: THE WHOLE HOUSE HAS GONE MAD!!!!!
Al: Oh-no! The food came back to haunt us for eating them!!!
Ed: The BOX hamsters?
Al: Well… For taking one of their relatives hostile in a cage! Called: a pet hamster.
Box hamsters: GASP! How could you?!?! We’re no pets to anyone!
Lettuce people: Free the toast! Free the toast!
Ed: I will, once I go to the bathroom! But then he’ll get flushed…
Milk: Milk! Milk! Drink your milk!!
Ed: NNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!
Winry: You guys don’t have to stop the war, but do it somewhere other than my refrigerator!!!
Box hamsters and lettuce people: Fine. If you don’t want us we’ll… just… well… uhh… Bye!
And the box hamsters and lettuce people moved the war into: the microwave.

Al, Ed, Winry, and Pinako all fainted to the ground and did not wake up from the dream of the milk.

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How did you like the first chapter? Not very much, we know, but we worked on this for two days straight! No sleep!!! Chapter 2 has Ed’s worst nightmare, the dream of MILK. This story was done by the help of the silented. This is our first story ever made, so cut us some slack!! If you hate it, then just don’t read it again. Authors Advise!!!
____________________________________________________________________Ok my friend help me with this, we were to lazy to put " in so we did that weird suff. Plzz Coment bad or good i don't care well I do but O well. It has low calls funny parts but some are funny....right kinda i know not good well just say what you think. ^^

I LOVE OUR STORY! ITS THE BEST STORY EVER MADE! and to those of u who disagree.. well.. well.. *sticks out tongue*

^what she said :P

LOL
box hampsters.... XD
priceless, bravo! *clapps* =D